22 May

i don’t know why am doing this.. it has been a while since i last cleaned the house all by myself.. except dishes of course I DO NOT do dishes..on my dead body ! i hate dishes !

yet i cleaned the bathroom and kitchen floor .. twice ! once with soup and the other with Dettoil .. ! still i don’t know why !

i made my mum’s bedroom,living room,even made her breakfast,did some laundry and ironing as well..

don’t loOK at me like that..! i enjoyed doing the damn stuff as i turn on my play list and dance through the cleaning phase !

but while am holding that towel in my hand and cleaning the coffee table i was like..

why again am doing this?and i began questioning my own intentions ! can you believe that ! I’m being suspicious about my own acts !

why the hell is that? :D

i was like “OK sandy tell me the truth,why u r doing this? is it because it has been so long since you last participated heavily in home cleaning torture?and as u r off these days so u decided to give a hand? or because you want mum to be happy?OR is it that fact that you are running away from studying ?”

i told myself ” i know am such a kid and i need to drag myself down and study”

and after i did ..i began beating myself up again..

why am i over thinking normal stuff I myself do? why am re questioning my own deeds and intentions for normal stupid things??

why am Turning against me?

is it because am happy these days and for the first time in a long while i sleep so deep and wake up with a smile on my face that i cant stand that am genuinely happy !?

wassup with that? OK i clean .. yaay me !!

stop being hard on urself stupid .. !!

Damn it !


6 Responses to “Cleaning”

  1. washwashat 22/05/2009 at 11:36 PM #

    انا عن نفسي يوم ما أنضف شقتنا بنفسي مش هحتاج أسأل نفسي انا باعمل كده ليه.. عشان بالـتأكيد هاكون عارفة السبب.. و هايكون ايه السبب يعني غير ان الست اللي بتنضف لنا الشقة ماجتش؟ :D

    بس فعلا مش عارفة لو عندي عبء زي المذاكرة و عايزة أهرب منه هانضف الشقة و لا لأ.. فعلا مش عارفة :D

  2. أمل 23/05/2009 at 2:01 PM #

    بعمل زيك لما اكون عايزة اهرب من المذاكرة
    بس حطي فوق التنضيف اني بدخل المطبخ واعمل حلويات اشكال والوان …. وطبعا انا اللي باكلها في الاخر جوزي يادوب بيدوق

    وارجع اقول المذاكرة بتخني … وانا مش بذاكر كويس
    لأ والجواز كمان بيتخني … والجواز بريء مني ومن أشكالي

    :) لو عايزة مساعدة ابقى ناديني المرة الجاية …. بس تاكلي معايا من اللي حعمله

  3. Knee 25/05/2009 at 4:44 PM #

    Stop beating yourself up stupid :P lol.
    So now the thought of the happy us is the weird one, not the other one..this is sad..
    bas bravoo 3lieki ennek 3amalti kol da :D
    I just wanted to ask..what studies? enti bet7addari 7aga? (and please don’t say the lame alsha of ba7addar 3afareet lol)

    Write on~ =)

  4. Cinderella 27/05/2009 at 1:35 PM #

    امل يا امل يلا بينا وليكي عليا اساعدك في الاتنين العمايل والاكل بس حضريلي بيبسي ونسكافيه

    بيبسي للحادق ونسكافيه للحلو


  5. Cinderella 27/05/2009 at 1:36 PM #

    wa7ed men elnas

    لا انا لا اعتقد انها المذاكرة ..او ..يمكن 50 في المية هروب مذاكرة والباقي مش كده :)

    هقوم اذاكر
    ربنا يستر

  6. Cinderella 27/05/2009 at 1:38 PM #

    yeah Knee..a certain degree of happiness for me is so good to be’s like ok something is gonna happen..something bad..
    not all happiness .. that high degree of happiness..i love it.. and im pessimisitic or anything it’s that .. it is like free falling.. i love it..cant wait to do it..but now while just thinking of it makes my heart beat so faaaaaaaaaaast :D

    see i didnt say the ta7deer ashba7 thingy :D

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