note to self

6 Feb

..as time went by .. i grew to be a burden on those who love me..instead of being a helper.. if anything ,am disappointed in me ..
am sorry people !

i really didn’t mean it ,
i really hope i could vanish right now..


at least then ..

i’ll be the one who says goodbye..


i dont want to say to myself “even this shall pass” what if i didnt want it to pass God Damn it !

just let me be..

even in sorrow i have to take care of others’ people feelings .. cause they get annoyed when am grieving ! even in sadness God Damn it !

just let me be ..

i wish that tomorrow people would go on strike and it would last for the following months .. or else.. easier much easier and pathetic i’d quit working..and living..and hopefully anything that would make me feel hopeful or happy or vulnerable..cause the things that can do that to you are the things that will hurt the most..and im tired of that..

there was this movie (the recruiter) it’s a military thing ,anyway ..in a fast round questions they would ask this

(dance in the rain or feel no pain)

i replied (dance in the rain cause pain makes me know that i still have a heart)

right now i’d say (screw this feel no pain by far)


GOD !

ya rab a7’tfy




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4 Responses to “note to self”

  1. ibhog 07/02/2010 at 1:27 AM #

    your posts are intense, and yes life sucks I agree, bass ya Cindy law ekhtafety .. I assure you .. many would notice.

    and yeah .. I wish I get numb these days too .. we need a public anesthetic.

    I hope things go well with you.

    • Cinderella 08/02/2010 at 9:17 PM #

      .. NO IBRAHEEM ..
      dont you get it ?
      no body will
      nobody

  2. Dina A.kader 07/02/2010 at 1:31 PM #

    I dont would want u 2 vanish !! it would be a silly thing to happen and boring by the way :PP
    dont b hard on ur self cindy u weren’t a burden ever on any1 !!! Hell wz them ..

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